If you’re not happy, walk away
If you’re not happy, walk away. Or drive away, as the case may be
The title of this post could have been so many different things. In the end, I decided on one that fit two different situations we have had this week.
If you’re not happy, walk away. Well, we drove away. And here’s why.
When we pulled into the boondocking spot near Why, there were more people than two weeks ago when we left. Our first thoughts were, we should have gone to Quartzsite. So the post title could have been, “Listen to your intuition, it’s always right.” We didn’t go to Quartzsite like we were thinking, and we should have listened.
We found an out of the way spot though, and were fairly happy. Then Thursday, a rig moved within 20 yards of us. So this post could have been called, “Boodndocking etiquette gone wrong.” Especially when said rig had a very loud radio, and for bonus points, a generator. We boondock for the peace and quite, if we wanted noise, we would stay in an RV park.
Then on Friday, 4 rigs joined this one. So this post could have been called, “When the neighborhood goes to shit, it’s time to move.” Bright and early Saturday morning we packed up and drove 200 miles away, leaving the din of generators behind us.
We were obviously meant to see this wonderful sunset from our new spot.
One thing I love about the RV life is the ability to get up and go if we need to. It’s a flexibility that owning a home does not afford. I have lived in places throughout my life, were getting up and moving would have been ideal.
The other walk away moment this week was something Al was going through. Al grew up in a world were he was never told he couldn’t do anything. His dad just handed him whatever, and told him to figure it out, he could do it. And he did. He has been building furniture since he was 12. He started the wood carving, and was great at it from the start. Same with sculpting. He took a few classes from a friend, but just hit the ground running. It helps that he is a true artist, with a lot of natural born talent.
He has been painting this winter, which is a new medium for him. He has produced some small pieces that I think are very good. Ever the perfectionist, he is not so happy with them. He started a new piece the other day and became so completely frustrated he had to just walk away. Then he came back, and packed all the paints and canvas away. He is not use to this imperfection, and not knowing “how” in his world. I jokingly told him, “Welcome to the real world. This is what everyone else goes through learning something new.” He wants to take some classes on technique, which I think is the perfect idea.
So the moral of the story for today is, don’t be afraid to walk away from something that doesn’t feel right. What’s the worst that can happen?
Have you ever done that, have you wished you could?
Oh dear sorry to read about the noisy neighbours. Have a marvellous Monday.
Best wishes Molly
Oh Mary, what a great lesson to review this morning. Walking away from a frustrating moment or situation is WISDOM. And in Al’s case of encountering this frustration in his art is what ARTISTS DO. Writers too – and it pays off. When something is simply not surfacing to the page, the best this to do is put it away, then return to it with fresh eyes, or in Al’s case, to seek instruction. Yes, totally, this is so important!
And your final destination in this case proved to be gorgeous. You truly capture the emotion of the day. Have a great Monday! Anita
It has to feel right for the artist, or writer. Forcing something is never a good idea.
Lovely sky captures and sunset.. It turns out moving was the best thing you did! Sorry about the noise.. Have a great day!
This begs the question, what is wrong with people? Why when a bus is almost empty does a person get on and sit down next to you when there are a million seats with no one. Why in an almost empty parking lot, does the next car in park right next to you? Some people must have no sense of space??? Stuff like that drives my mom crazy as she likes to have her space. Unfortunately, Mom doesn’t want to hurt any feelings so she stays put and is just frustrated, but it is a similar situation to yours. Glad you can just drive on!
What is wrong with people? Two other times in the past few years we have been camping in a huge open field. And what happens, someone camps RIGHT next to us! I so don’t get it.
The majority of people have this magnetic need to be near other people at all times. It is weird but also sad that so many people can’t hack being alone or, more so, that being in nature isn’t enough to make people feel comfortable. I am an extrovert but talking to me pets, plants or a crow on a wire fulfills me. Yet usually I am the one considered weird when I also do not want another camper (especially a noisy one!) near me when there are other options. Good for you for moving on. And, yes, I wish everyday that I could do that. It’s why I know I will make an excellent full time nomad someday!
This is such a great post and message. Yes, there are some things that I have wished I could walk away from, and there have been others that I was glad in the end that I hadn’t walked away from.
Yes, that is true for me too.
Getting used to imperfection is a challenge we all face! But it’s why we keep trying to learn and improve. Your husband was right to turn away as he became frustrated–never want to dig a deeper hole! He’ll come back refreshed I’m sure!
He does know when to stop, and not make it worse.
Oh, I SO hear you! When I used to go camping, we always picked isolated spots so we would hear nothing but birds, crickets (LOVED being lulled to sleep by the night bug songs), sometimes rushing water and the breeze rustling the foliage; I even liked hearing rain hitting the tent. I never felt so good or slept so well. Then one time, someone set up camp not 20 feet from us – there’s a whole wilderness out there, and this is where they decide to camp! We pulled up stakes within half an hour and found another spot. Wow Al has such a lifetime of creativity. I can imagine how frustrating it must be for him when he can’t capture what he sees and feels on canvas, but personally I thought his painting you posted was excellent. I think it’s wonderful that he was raised to achieve anything.
I don’t get why people have to do that. It’s great when you can move though. Al grew up in the best possible way for someone with so much talent.
You can always go back. You can always return. Enjoy the path your now on. The future holds on to what we have learned. Some never use their talents. Some put them away. Some multiply their talents. Some don’t do them everyday. Sometimes I have enjoyed getting to a place so much more than when I finally arrived. Creative minds seem to grow tired or frustrated of not being able to push what they do to another level because Its all in their mind.
Love the analogy — and the symmetry of your words!
So true — we always have choice. To walk away, and to dig in when creating isn’t going quite right! :)
My sister chose to walk away from Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome on Saturday. It was a hard fought battle and she was a warrior. It is okay to walk away from something that is not alright for you. Al will be stronger for his decision and those nasty neighbors just missed the chance of being around two of the most amazing people! Their loss!
I’m so sorry Sherone, that’s very very hard.
First, those are gorgeous photos!
I like to sketch (although I rarely do it anymore) and I used to get midway into something, and just rip it up! The frustration of it not looking as I wanted it to, or not capturing the subject right would push my buttons, and in the trash it went!
I think some people just like to be near other people and don’t realize they are invading your space. But in the case of that big rig, since they had friends coming, they were just rude and wanted the spot you had.
Goodness! As someone who has painted I think Al needs to understand that with oil paints its never done, you can keep retouching, re-doing for a long time before anything becomes permanent, that’s what I always loved about oils the most. I am glad that you just proved how difficult it is to get truly away from everything! Love Dolly
Wise words and some beautiful skies!
Ugh, I hate that when someone sits, parks, camps, etc. right nex to you when there’s plenty of space elsewhere. We’ve had that experience – pick a nice quiet camping spot and then someone pulls up with a generator and a TV. Great. On the other hand… I thought many times of walking away from my last novel. I really thought it was crappy and boring, but (luckily) Jane, the main character, wouldn’t stop “talking” to me in my head. I totally would have walked away, but she wouldn’t let me – and I’m glad she didn’t!
I’m glad you didn’t walk away from the new novel, it’s going to be great. I just know it.
glad you were able to move away from the noisy folks! ugh!
and good luck to your painter-in-training. :)
That is one of the many wonderful things about living in a house on wheels, it can move anytime you want:) But isn’t it amazing how ignorant some people are! It is all about them. Thank goodness there aren’t many of them.
Hope Al does return to painting:)
It is nice there aren’t too many ignorant people. I would be nutso if there were.
Ah, the beauty of this lifestyle… we’re not stuck with neighbors we don’t like and sometimes the scenery is even better in that new location :-)
It is the #1 perk, isn’t it.
That sunset is to die for!
wonderful wonderful advice. For the sake of self-protection, yes, I have, and we will keep it at that. :)
Making the choices along the way leads us to better things…:)JP
Oh absolutely! Great post! We’ve walked away from a few apartment units because of horrendous neighbors and lost money on deposits, etc. We’ve also recently walked away from a family situation that was just toxic and not good. It’s not always easy walking away but sometimes you have to.
Sometimes you have to be in self preservation mode.
Beautiful photos, and great food for thought. Walking away doesn’t mean giving up; sometimes it’s what you need to gain a new perspective. And see a beautiful sunset.
–Wags (and purrs) from Life with Dogs and Cats
So very true!!
Great post, and glad you’ve found a better spot! I feel for Al; I’m a perfectionist and understand the frustration.
Fabulous, incredible photos! Wow, wow, and wow!!!!
We’ve had that horrible breach of camping etiquette too. What comes over people? They think it’s ok to pull in right next to your peaceful spot. And then they don’t even try to be thoughtful about noise etc. Generators? Ugh. I’m glad you found such a better place with such a fabulous sunset!
Neighbours are Gods revenge for letting us pick our own friends!!
Cheers – Stewart M – Melbourne
Hmmmm. Some people just don’t get it that other people like peace and quiet. You were smart to move on…and discover that beautiful sunset. Yeah, learning how to do something new can be so frustrating. The next time Al opens his paints he might be a tad more patient with himself and take his work to a new level.
Yes, so many of us are afraid to leave, no matter how unhappy we are in a situation. Very well put, and the photos are wonderful.
That must have been a nice feeling, being about to pull away from the big rigs. Great lesson on being able to walk away. I’m getting ready to try my hand at painting too and I’m hoping it turns out well. Wishing Al good luck…don’t give up too soon though. :)
I totally understand why you drove away! Back in the days when my hubby and I had an RV, we were constantly looking for campgrounds that would afford us some privacy. We would drive around on some weekends, just checking out different campgrounds….privacy is hard to find unless you’re tenting. We finally found one we loved, that was rustic and not commercialized and ended up parking our camper there for a couple of years.
I also understand where Al is coming from…it can be difficult to be a perfectionist! I’ve been known to give up on things when I can’t achieve that.
What beautiful photographs…and a great philosophy too.
I envy your ability to move when you stop liking a place. It sounds ideal! I am looking forward to seeing more of where you went.
Tell Al to take a look at his art supplies. Is he using a decent quality of paint and brushes? I was so frustrated when I first started and getting some better quality tools and materials made a big difference for me. When brushes don’t hold paint and the paint doesn’t flow well it can be very frustrating! I hope he doesn’t give up entirely.
I really wish I could sometimes. I do envy the nomadic life you have and have always wanted to do that. Maybe someday I’ll get that wish.
What a great message. I have done this. I don;t regret it either. Hope Al finds the right feeling for this new medium. He definitely has talent.